Military Transition Experience – Looking back

Have you ever seen one of those cartoons where a character thinks they’re all set to head out toward a shimmering oasis of palm trees and gorgeous water and then it flashes forward to them discovering they were actually heading toward a mirage and now they’re stuck in a barren wasteland with no water or food or sunscreen? Yeah…that pretty much sums up my military transition experience.

When I left the service in 2007, I thought being a civilian would be a piece of cake. I’d survived briefing generals, exercises in full-on chem gear, managing multi-million-dollar budgets and hundreds of people, and even the dangers of Afghanistan. The Transition Assitance Program, which focused on whether I could dress myself appropriately when not in uniform, how to cut and paste my OPR bullets into a civilian resume, and a bunch of Veteran Affairs (VA) benefits that I was sure I wouldn’t need. Did nothing to dim my confidence.

Military Transition Experience

Flash forward to the months after I got my DD-214 and all that confidence was gone. The civilian world I experienced was a confusing, chaotic place. Where people looked at me funny when I said I was a veteran. I quickly discovered that, while the military had given me many skills and experiences that were helpful in the civilian and corporate environments. There were many things specific to those environments that I was unprepared for.

I didn’t know how to negotiate a salary and severely undervalued my skills and experience. I didn’t know that I should get a job offer in writing. And I was completely unprepared when the first company I worked for promised me one thing during the hiring process and then told me something else once I started. I didn’t expect how much of a gut punch it would be when the gate guards who used to respectfully call me “ma’am” and engage in conversation with me suddenly dismissed me as irrelevant when I drove through those same gates as a military spouse. And I didn’t know how challenging it would be to make new friends or define myself without my uniform.

Giving back to others

It wasn’t until I began working at a college and helping student veterans with their GI Bill and VA education benefits that I realized my experience wasn’t a product of me just doing it all wrong. Hundreds of my students struggled with similar issues when they transitioned. It turns out: transition is hard. And, too often, we don’t realize that until it’s too late. Until we’re already out in that desert clawing our way through the sand.

Fifteen years later, I’ve found my way to my oasis and a civilian life I’m happy with. I have redefined myself outside of my military experience, found my people, learned to succeed in the business world, and even figured out how to navigate the VA. Now when I work with veterans and transitioning service members. I give them the advice, tools, and resources I wish I’d had when I was still serving. So they can find their own oasis without having to spend years wandering the military transition desert like I did.

Here are 3 tips I give them:

Be Specific

Part of the overwhelm that comes with transition is trying to think about too many things. When we get this way, we start moving in all different directions at once. I call this “carpet bombing.” And it’s ineffective.  Instead, start limiting your options. Even if you don’t know what you do want. Eliminating what you know you don’t want can help you narrow the field and direct your efforts more effectively.

Get on the Veteran Train

The instant you start thinking about leaving the service, you need to stop thinking about yourself only as a service member and start thinking about yourself as a veteran, too. Start reading news articles that apply to veterans. Look at resources geared towards veterans. And start researching veteran opportunities. You have to adjust your information flow to account for where you’re going, not just where you’re at.

Use Your Veterans Benefits

Remember how I said I was sure I wouldn’t need those VA benefits? Wow, was I wrong! Education, healthcare, mental health support, networking opportunities, home loans – I’ve used them all in the fifteen years since I left the service. Even if you think you won’t need them. At least get your name in the system anyway. Far too many veterans only realize how helpful those resources are when they are in crisis mode. Crawling through that desert. And trust me when I say: that is not when you want to try to navigate VA paperwork.

Sarah Maples is the owner of Sarah Maples LLC, where she provides coaching, consulting, writing, and editing to service members, veterans, and defense and veteran-related organizations. She is also the founder of After the DD-214, a military transition resources site. After serving 7 years as an Air Force Intelligence Officer, including deployments to Afghanistan and Saudi Arabia, Sarah left the military and began serving her fellow veterans. Her past positions include helping veterans and their families use their VA benefits as a School Certifying Official, working for the Veterans Health Administration, and being the first woman to serve as Director of National Security and Foreign Affairs for the Veterans of Foreign Wars, where she advocated in Washington, D.C on behalf of their 1.7 million membership. Her writing has appeared in national media outlets, including The Atlantic, ClearanceJobs, and Task & Purpose, and the Line of Advance anthology Our Best War Stories

Transitioning from the military isn't easy. Listen to Sarah's story and the three tips she gives to service members when they leave the military. #military #transition #leavingthemilitary #militarylife #militarywomen

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